Friday, April 1, 2011

Moving On

Yesterday was Ellison's 2 month appointment which means it is time for shots, and mom to go back to work.   She is growing just fine.  She is now 11 lb 1 oz and 23 1/4 inches.  She had a little bit of an eye infection, so we are taking care of that now, but overall, she is just as healthy as she could be.

 Nothing like a sleeping baby!

 Showing off her camo band aids. 
 This is Michael's favorite outfit!

I on the other hand am facing one of the most bittersweet moments I have ever faced.  I am excited to go back to work.  I was a terrible teacher and coworker for the last several months.  Those that told me "enjoy pregnancy you will miss it when it is over" are so WRONG!  I have not missed it once.  One word to describe pregnancy for me is prison!  Yes, I was excited about our new little addition to come, but that was not my only thought.  Selfishly, I was so sick that the majority of the time I just wanted my present state of throwing up to be over. It was hard to be excited about what was to come.  I was angry that I could not workout especially when people thought it was a good time to tell me about some super woman who ran a 5k every day of her pregnancy.  Do you not know that I am super competitive!  I remember one time I went walking around the block, then I ran in the house 2 minutes later only to throw up from moving too much!  I hated seeing my body change like that.  I hated not being able to enjoy food.  After 10 months of getting HUGE and throwing up constantly, you can see how much I must have hated pregnancy, and how bad a teacher, coworker, and mainly wife I must have been (EDIT: I (Michael) do not think that Leslie was or has ever been a bad wife. She has been an absolutely incredible wife.).   On that school took great care of me though, and I am extremely thankful for that.  So with that thought on mind, I am excited to go back and actually do my job correctly.  BUT now I have my sweet Ellison.  I have been with her constantly for the past 8 weeks, and the thought of leaving her makes me so sad.  I just love watching her sleep like I am doing now.  I love being the one to feed her every meal.  I do not want to miss anything, so I am stuck in this terrible place, scared to miss anything, but I know it is what I need to do right now. I guess life just moves on.  The Lord has blessed me in allowing me to be home these 8 weeks to allow me to learn to love my sweet girl, to be a mom, to be a wife again, and to learn well language! :)  I am kinda in love with my family right now.  I have an amazing husband who has become an amazing dad.  And I have a beautiful daughter, who is just learning how to live.  So here we are....bittersweet.

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